


Pick-Up Lines

by LittleOnexx



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Draco is gonna kill harry if he doesn't stop, Harry wont stop telling Draco pick-up lines, M/M, Pick-Up Lines, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-09 13:10:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11105223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleOnexx/pseuds/LittleOnexx
Summary: I got this idea from Laura Clery.





	1. Chapter 1

"Draco?" Says Harry, plopping down on the couch next to his boyfriend with a smirk. Draco inhales deeply, placing his book down.

"Yes, Harry?" Murmurs Draco in an annoyed tone and looks at his boyfriend.

"Are you a beaver? Because damn!" Shouts Harry, Draco groans pushing Harry away. Harry laughs, walking away. 

The next day, Draco was at the Slytherin table with Pansy and Blaise when Harry slides next to him. Pansy raises her eyebrows.

"Potter, what the hell?" Growls Blaise, Harry looks at Draco who looks shocked.

"Hey Malfoy?" Chuckles Harry, grabbing one of his grapes and shoving it in his mouth.

"Yes, Potter?" Groans Draco, glaring at Harry.

"You know I use to sell hot dogs?" Harry tells Draco, Draco chokes on his drink.

"No." Coughs Draco, looking at his stupid boyfriend.

"Oh yeah. I sure know how to make a weiner stand." Jokes Harry, making a gasping noise while getting up while Pansy and Blaise laugh their arses off at a flushed and very annoyed Draco. 

During potions, Draco decided to switch roles so he went up to Harry, nudging him with his shoulder while Ron glared at him.

"Oye Potter. Are you a gardener?" Asks Draco, wrapping his arm around Harry's shoulder. Harry looks at him confused..

"No?" Mumbles Harry, completely confused.

"Because I could be your ho." Jokes Draco, Ron snorts not before choking on his spit. Harry smiles at his boyfriend before bursting into laughter a Draco walked back to his seat where Pansy and Blaise shook their heads in embarrassment.

Hallway meetings were the funniest. Harry ran up to Draco causing him to jump and punch him in his chest. 

"My love for you is like Diarrhea." Whispers Harry, Draco gags before starting to run. Harry laughs before screaming - "Because I just can't hold it in!" Draco falls onto his knees, laughing while his Slytherin team laughs are him. 

The next day, they were in the room of requirement. Draco pushes Harry onto the bed capturing Harry's lips with his own. Harry snorts causing Draco to groan.

"Please no puns today." Complains Draco, Harry smirks.

"Draco?" Asks Harry, Draco sighs.

"What?" Sneers Draco, climbing on the bed next to his lover.

"Are you Chinese Take-away?" Questions Harry, Draco blushes.

"Why?" Asks Draco, shaking his head.

"Because I want to chow down on your pork balls." Draco laughs loudly, before kissing his boyfriend and hard. 

The next day, Draco pushes Harry against the wall.

"Potter. Are you a fag (cigarette)?" Inquires Draco, as Harry's friends watch in frustration. 

"No." Groans Harry, biting his lip.

"Cause your smoking hot and I wanna put your bum in my mouth." Whispers Draco, Harry lets out a small squeak before Draco releases him with a smirk as he walks away. 

In Potions once again, Draco decides it's time to embarrass Harry and himself so he jumps on his desk which Pansy tries to get him down.

"Potter! Are you a fireman?" Shouts Draco, smirking.

"No!" Snarls Harry, a sneer plastered on his face.

"Cause I can see your hose drippin!" Screams Draco, making a thrusting motion only to fall off the desk onto the hard floor making everyone laugh while Harry hides his face chuckling and blushing. 

During lunch, Harry runs over to Draco's table again and sits next him.

"Oh lord." Groans Pansy, Draco smiles. 

"Draco, are you the SATs?" Inquires Harry with a smirk..

"No." Mumbles Draco, his chin in his hand. 

"Because I'd do you for three hours and forty-five minutes with a ten minute snack break. Whoa!" Screams Harry, running away leaving a blushing Draco with his laughing friends.

They were in Herbology, when Draco sneaks up behind Harry, wrapping his arms around him.

"Harry, are you a birthday cake?" Whispers Draco, nibbling on his neck.

"W-Why?" Shudders Harry, closing his eyes. 

"Because I wanna lick all the frosting off your candle." Growls Draco, thrusting his front into Harry's bum before walking back to his Slytherin group. Harry bites his lip, blushing.


	2. Part 2

"Draco!" Shouts Harry, Draco runs out of his bathroom in his room. 

"What is it?" Asks Draco in a rush, looking around worried Snape or one of the many other Slytherin was in his room. 

"Breathe if you want to have sex with me." Announces Harry with a smirk, Draco take a long deep breath before letting out. Harry chuckles as Draco walks over to him.

It was now time for supper and Draco strutted over to the Gryffindor table and sits on his boyfriends lap. Harry growls with a sneer.

"Ferret, get off my best friend!" Sneers Ron, making his apple explode from holding it too tight.

"Potter? You know what would look good on you?" Asks Draco, biting his lip slowly grinding his hips. Harry squeaks, looking up at Draco.

"W-What?" Inquires Harry, gripping Draco's hips tightly.

"Me." Growls Draco, grinding his hips one more times before jumping off Harry's lap and running out of the great hall. Harry blushes while Ron and Hermione looked at him in shock.

"Was he just grinding his hips onto you? That's sexual assault!" Shouts Ron, slamming his fists against the table.

"It's okay." Whispers Harry, looking at the doorway where Draco ran off too. 

 

They were now in the room of requirement and Harry was frustrated. 

"I can't believe you did that!" Shouts Harry, throwing a ball at Draco who barely dodged it. 

"It was funny and sexy! I'm sorry!" Shouts Draco, tears stinging his eyes. Harry sneers at him.

"You're a bloody idiot." Sneers Harry, crossing his arms. Draco looks down, sniffling. 

"Roses are red.. My face is too. But that only happens when I'm around you." Whispers Draco, Harry looks at him.

"Pardon?" Asks Harry, walking closer to Draco.

"Roses are red.. My face is too. But that only happens when I'm around you!" Shouts Draco, looking at his boyfriend with teary eyes.

"Don't cry." Whispers Harry, pulling Draco into his arms.

"If you were a squirrel, would you help me bust a nut?" Whispers Draco, Harry groans pushing him away.

"You had to ruin the moment!" Laughs Harry before kissing Draco. 

Once again in potions class, Draco decided to embarrass himself.

"Potter! Do you know your ABC's?" Asks Draco loudly before blushing and walking over to him.

"Why must you interrupt my class, Mr. Malfoy?" Sneers Snape, crossing his arms. 

"Cause I wanna give you the fourth letter of the alphabet." Draco whispers very lowly into Potters ear causing him to shiver. Draco smirks and walks away back to his seat, letting Snape continue his lesson.


	3. Pt. 3

"Hey Draco?" Says Harry, walking up to his boyfriend who was with Pansy and Blaise.

"I swear to Merlin if this is a pun at five a.m in the morning, I'm going to hurt you." Sneers Draco, Harry grins.

"The floor is lava." Whispers Harry, Draco glares before jumping onto the windowsill with Blaise and Pansy while Harry laughs while quickly running away from the three angry Slytherin.

It was only an hour into Breakfast when Harry plopped himself down onto Draco's lap. 

"Potter!" Growls Draco, sneakily wrapping his arms around Harry's waist. Harry looks at Draco longingly before smiling.

"You're definitely on my to-do list tonight." Murmurs Harry before biting his lip. Draco widens his eyes not registering that Harry had gotten up and walked back to his own table. 

"When are you two gonna stop with the pick-up lines?" Inquires Pansy, shoving a piece of french toast into her mouth. Draco looks at her with wide eyes.

"Honestly? Probably never." Answers Draco truthfully grabbing his drink and taking a sip. "Though I sometimes wish it would." 

They were now in DADA and Umbridge wasn't paying attention so Harry took his chance to sneak over to his boyfriend with another smirk. 

"Harry, go sit back down before you get another detention!" Whispers Draco, looking at Harry. 

"But I needed to know if there is a mirror in your pocket because I can see myself in your pants." Whispers Harry rushing back to his seat just as Umbridge turned around with a crude look. Draco sighs with a smile continuing his work. What was he gonna do with his idiot boyfriend?

Lunch times came quickly and Draco, once again, strutted over to the Gryffindor table where Ron was sound asleep while Hermione was reading and Harry was picking at his food. 

"Harry." Murmurs Draco, sitting down next to him. Harry jumps and looks at him with a grin while Hermione looks at them fondly. 

"Yes?" Says Harry switching his glance between Draco's soft pink lips and his mercury eyes. 

"We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows. You're hot and I want to be on top of you." Announces Draco quietly - making sure not to wake up the Weasel that was right next to the Mudblood. Hermione gasps, looking completely shocked at Draco's pick-up line while Harry changes his grin into a smirk. 

"We can easily make that happen in the next twenty minutes." Mumbles Harry quietly, Hermione squeals. 

"I don't need to be hearing about your sex life guys!" Shouts Hermione quietly - surely not to wake Ron. 

"Then don't listen." Draco bit, before getting up not before kissing Harry hair. Harry glares at Draco not happy that he was rude to his friend but was enjoying that he was becoming for publicly affectionate to him though his father has been visiting Hogwarts more often.

Draco was on the couch in the Slytherin common room when he heard a loud thud and a groan.

"Pansy?" He calls out, she pokes her head out from Blaise hug. 

"Yes?" She calls, he ignores it before getting up only to trip over nothing. 

"Bloody hell!" Groans Draco, before reaching out to feel a body. "Potter?" Whispers Draco, Harry pokes his face out from his invisiblity cloak with a blush and smile. 

"Hi..." Whispers Harry, Draco smirks.

"Screw me if I'm wrong but haven't we met before?" Jokes Draco, Harry stiffles his laughter as Draco helps him up.   
"I'm going to my room!" Shouts Draco, Blaise shouts back with - "Use protection!" 

"Don't let this go to your head, but do you want some?" Asks Harry, causing Draco to cough and look at him as they enter the head boys room. Draco smirks before kissing him pulling the cloak off completely.


End file.
